With pre-season now upon us, it’s time for our media manager to embarrass himself by making wild predictions of who is going to finish where in the forthcoming Pitching In NPL Premier Division season.

With a huge bias for our Morpeth Town, and tongue firmly in cheek, let’s see what he thinks lies in store for the 22 teams all looking to finish top of the tree…

Ashton United

A strange opponent, they’ve hammered us 4-1 at Craik Park in one season and we’ve returned the favour with a six-point haul last season, a 2-1 away win in January followed up with a 2-0 home success later in the campaign. After a season pre-dominantly of struggle, they lost three of their last five games to end 14th. Well clear of danger but coming up short for the play-off places, after discussion with an Ashton club member it became clear they struggle in a heavily congested football area to get and keep the best talent, with local rivals above and below them in the football structure.

Prediction: It may well be a repeat of last season, with moments of promise and the odd highlight in a season that will end in mid-table security.

Atherton Collieries

Atherton ended the campaign far too close to the relegation places for their liking but were never in real trouble of falling through the trapdoor. They’ve got a tremendous knack of picking up crucial points throughout the season, but they could yet be pulled even closer to the drop zone next season. But with the lively James Hooper sure to be among the goals, they could yet progress further up the NPL Premier Division.

Prediction: Lower third of the division

Bamber Bridge

A superb campaign saw them fall short in the chase for the play-off places. They flirted with those positions throughout the campaign, thanks to loanees who shone from professional clubs in the early stages of the campaign. Unfortunately for Bridge, they left and the momentum faltered a touch. A free-flowing team who really did a number on Morpeth twice last season, they’ll be ready for a play-off push once again.

Prediction: They’ll be in the mix for a play-off place for long periods of the campaign. Whether they can push it over the line and secure a spot remains to be seen.

Belper Town

We know a bit about Belper after playing them in our title-winning NPL East campaign. Full of great volunteers and the best lemon drizzle cake in non-league, Belper has an upwardly mobile squad that will be buoyed by promotion last season. Morpeth – checks notes – haven’t beaten them yet. Greg Tempest and Janni Lipka add experience to a strong squad so don’t expect them to be battling the drop this season.

Prediction: Mid-table awaits, and who knows if they can gather a bit of end of season momentum?

FC United

Fascinating to clash with FC United last season, they have possibly the friendliest away support in our division. A pleasure to welcome, they discussed the approach of the club: make themselves sustainable first and not throw every penny at the first team budget. With the promise of playing in front of big crowds at a purpose-built stadium, FC United don’t have anywhere near the biggest budget, but they attract quality young players. It will be interesting to see if they can take that next step and secure a play-off spot they fell short of last season (losing 1-0 at Craik Park to seal their fate).

Prediction: One of the big play-off contenders, they’ll be hard to beat and one every team will enjoy facing.

Gainsborough Trinity

Gainsborough are going to really strugg….stops writing as Clayton Donaldson signs…oh. With the potential to be a gamechanger at this level following his release from York City, the striker has the ability to galvanise a squad that may well struggle to climb away from the lower reaches.

With the best hospitality for away club officials, we’re looking forward to our trip to Trinity. Well, I am anyway.

Prediction: Bottom third, but with pie, chips and gravy for visiting officials.